Friday, February 19, 2010

The Accident after the Accident...

So I had to go back to the hospital a couple weeks after the accident because surgery was needed on my hip to remove some fragments that had been left behind in the ball and socket of my hip when they put it back into place.  This surgery really freaked me out, at first I was fine with it, but when they were discussing the surgery the surgeon told me they would have to redislocate my hip. I knew that I would be under, but if anyone out there has had their hip dislocated, they NEVER want to go through it again. That alone, scared me beyond words. I had many blessings and visits from wonderful friends to comfort me, and by the time the surgery came, I was hesitant but, somewhat prepared as prepared as you can be....

Back in my room after the surgery, my family was there for support and guidance, and everything seemed to have gone right. I was so excited that this was the final hurdle and that from here on out everything would be better. I had already given up going to school, given up my job, given up being with friends and family, I might have also given up some ability to dance and perform in shows but it was worth it as long as I was safe. I knew then that I could conquer this next little bit of recovery.

Then, 24 hours after the surgery I wasn't gaining motion in my leg. It's typical for the first little bit not to have motion, but it had been way to long for me to still not to have control. It was decided that something had gone wrong, so they had to go in for a second time to explore the nerve to see what had happened. This time was even worse then the first. I had no preparation time to get mentally ready for what was going on, I just had to grit my teeth and go. So then went the second surgery...

Now, for the results of the second surgery. It turned out that my sciatic never had been stitched and cut during surgery. This is what was causing my leg from the knee down to be paralyzed. It was so hard hearing those words from the Doctor... I couldn't help but control my tears as I was so lost about what was going on and if this could really happen to me. Ever since the accident I was so grateful to my Heavenly Father for how blessed I had been since the accident, I knew that the impact of the tree and the amount of damage done to my body I was lucky to be alive, and I was also lucky not to be paralyzed or injured any worse than I was. I prayed constantly in thanks that I was spared and so protected. To find out news like this, that I was paralyzed because of a Doctor's mistake was to much to handle. I had spent the last two weeks in gratitute that I wasn't.

After letting things sink in, and realizing that I still had many options... life went on... my family was still there... I still had support from my friends... I knew that instead of this being the last hurdle, this was the first of many. But having my life being spared was a miracle, I knew if God willed it he'd give me another.

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